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How to Be Supportive to Your Gay Bestie

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11th June, 2021 05:30 IST

Our society does not do very well with accepting homosexuality, and the least we can do for our homosexual friends is to be supportive and a pillar of never-ending strength. Here’s what you can do to support a gay friend.

1. When s/he comes out to you...

Know that the conversation is not about you, and that it’s important to remain focused on them and their struggles. It doesn't matter how you are feeling at this point - your job is to provide all the help and support they need.


2. Be a good listener

You might not have easy solutions to all the problems they face at home with their parents and siblings. Nor would you be able to understand completely just how difficult it is to constantly hide who you really are. But you can be a good listener and help them get things off of their chest.

3. Offer to help out if sh*t hits the fan

There are a number of things you can do if things get really tense at your friend’s home and s/he needs to move out. If they need to crash at your place for a day or two, if they need to talk - anything and everything they need, be there to help out.


4. Ask about their workplace and whether s/he might face judgement for his/her sexual orientation

It’s always good to have your friend’s back.

5. Do not tell others

Your friend probably told you about his/her sexual orientation in confidence, and it would be completely uncool if you went and told others. Breaking someone’s trust is never a good idea.

6. If you see your other friends being unsupportive and nasty, do all you can to put an end to such harassment

Honestly, this is basic human decency. Every one of us is equal, no matter what our sexual orientation might be. No one should have to face abuse because of it.


7. Remember, sex is only one part of your friend’s identity as a homosexual

Homosexuality is often conflated with promiscuity. This is obviously not the case, and sexuality is not simply about sex. It is also about love and intimacy and how we perceive the world.


8. Don’t succumb to cliches and stereotypes

Just because your friend is gay doesn’t mean s/he will automatically want to accompany you on shopping trips to the mall. Respect your friend’s individuality.

9. Know that s/he probably faces a lot of harassment at home, work, with friends and even on social media

You need to be their backbone, and support them in each and every personal, social and political struggle to fight for their rights.

10. Connect them with other friends who are openly out

Help him/ her make friends with those who have been going through the same challenges and can offer support and inspiration in a way that you can't.


GIFs courtesy: tumblr, giphy, collegehumor

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