Ruth Langsford tearfully says 'I'll never know why' as she opens up devastating tragedy
Ruth Langsford has spoken about the impact of the death of her sister. The former This Morning presenter tragically lost her sister Julia to suicide in 2019.
She opened up about the devastating loss in her book Feeling Fabulous and was asked about it in a recent podcast appearance. During an emotional appearance on Fearne Cotton's Happy Place podcast was asked how she dealt with the loss of her sister when Julia was just 62.
Fearne told Ruth that it was “so moving and beautiful” how Ruth described and wrote about Julia in her book before asking what Ruth thought had helped her when it came to dealing with grief.
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In response, understandably becoming tearful, Ruth spoke about the impact of losing someone to suicide and the overriding question such a tragedy leaves behind.
She said: “I think suicide is just, it’s such a tragedy and the people left behind are just left not knowing why. And your question is just ‘Why? Why? Why? Why?’
“And then, as time has gone on, I’ve accepted that I’ll never know why and nothing will bring her back.”
Explaining how she began the process of attempting to move on and heal and to live again, Ruth added: “The only way that I can make any sense of it and stop it hurting is to just know she didn’t want to be here and nothing I could have done could have changed that really.
“Because you think ‘If only I should have rung her more, I should have done this I should have come down’.
“You just think you could have done something. Why didn’t we see it? How could we not have seen it? Why didn’t she talk to us? Why? Why? Why? And there are no answers because she’ll never be able to tell us why.”
Ruth went onto explain that one of the big motivators she had in her recovery was knowing her sister would not want to her to live a sad life and that she would not want that for Ruth.
She concluded: “I just miss her so much but I know she would not want me to have sad life and I did a lot crying I did a lot of time off work and then I thought, ‘She doesn’t want this for you’…you need to get back out there. And work has always been my saviour actually.”
For emotional support, you can call the Samaritans 24-hour helpline on 116 123, email jo@samaritans.org, visit a Samaritans branch in person or go to the Samaritans website.