Bobby Deol says his mother Prakash Kaur didn't let Dharmendra's fame and glory get to her, she was simple: 'A mother plays a big role in how kids are'
Before finding renewed success with 'Race 3' and enjoying a career resurgence, Bobby Deol went through one of the most difficult periods of his life. Work offers had slowed down, his confidence had taken a hit, and he found himself drinking heavily. Looking back, the actor says it was his wife, Tanya Deol , who stood by him through it all and helped him rebuild his life.
Bobby reflected on the women who have shaped him the most, his mother, Prakash Kaur , and his wife, Tanya. He began by speaking about how his mother's role in the Deol family is often overlooked because she has never been part of the film industry.
“My mother has been a housewife all her life. People keep thinking that our dad is the biggest reason for the way we are, but it is never that way. It’s the mother who plays the biggest role in how the kids are. Because my mom is not an actor, so we end up talking more about my father. But my mother is just an amazing woman. She was so young when she got married to him. The fame and the glory that came, she never really got into it. She was a simple woman and still is… totally grounded,” he said in an interview with Ranveer Allahbadia on his podcast.
Dharmendra and Prakash Kaur married in 1954, before the legendary actor moved to Mumbai to pursue his film career. Together, they raised four children—Sunny, Bobby, Ajeeta and Vijayta. Years later, Dharmendra married Hema Malini in 1980.
Drawing parallels with his own marriage, Bobby spoke about the immense contribution women make to a household, often without receiving enough recognition.
“I am seeing that happening with my own personal life, with my wife. My wife works. We come from a very strict culture where women don’t work and men go out to work, but people make it sound like women are not working. But, they are doing the most important job – taking care of the house. The women has to keep worrying about the house. They are so strong, I have a lot of respect for them.”
The actor went on to describe Tanya as the pillar of strength who helped him navigate the darkest chapter of his life when his career had stalled for over a decade.
“I have learnt so much from my mother that way, and from my wife. My wife is like my backbone. I am what I am today is because my wife stood by me. I would have been scattered without her. The problem is… Your family would never be that blunt with you. But a wife can see you and she knows what you’re capable of. She stood by me throughout those dark times, for those 10-15 years, she was working and taking care of things, financially and everything. She has brought up my boys so well,” he shared.
Bobby also fondly revisited the beginning of his love story with Tanya, recalling how he first noticed her at a party in the mid-1990s.
“When I look back, 30 years ago when I used to party a lot, I went to this card party. I didn’t play cards and I was in crutches which slowed me down a little bit. I saw this woman sitting there and that was it. I had seen her somewhere earlier as well, when I was with a few friends. I still remember she was wearing a striped top. I told someone to tell her that I said ‘Hi’,” he recounted.
Their paths crossed again, and Bobby was determined not to let the opportunity slip away.
“So when we met at the card party for the second time, I hate gambling and I was losing to her. I asked her, ‘Can I take you out for dinner instead?’ Then, I chased her and I used to gatecrash parties to meet her. Finally, the day I spoke to her, we spoke for hours and hours, it was just meant to be. Despite having a very reckless lifestyle, my father-in-law agreed to our marriage because he had so much respect for my father.”
After nearly three decades of marriage, Bobby says he has realised that relationships are built on understanding rather than trying to change one another.
“I have learnt one thing that nothing is perfect. You go through ups and downs in your relationship. Every time the other person is trying to change the other person for their own desires and wants, and you learn. Marriage is not like ‘Oh, I am married now, I have to behave this way’.”
He added, “You learn, you realise, and you see that you cannot change each other. But, try to compromise at times and be something for the moment, because the other person wants it, but you can’t change the other person completely. That’s one of the most important things in a marriage, and respect, trust.”
Bobby also candidly addressed his struggles with alcohol and admitted that it was during that period that he truly understood everything Tanya had been doing for the family.
“When I wasn’t intoxicated anymore and started looking after myself. She was my inspiration because I was sitting at home and she took care of everything. I never thought of what all she was going through. That’s when I realised, I had just taken my wife for granted. What kind of example am I as a parent? That changed everything,” he said.
Reflecting on those years, the actor acknowledged that Tanya endured the most difficult version of him, yet never stopped supporting him.
“My wife got the worst of me. She was the only one who took and was still there for me. My wife is many years younger than me and she has taught herself the business she is doing. She was into interiors, very good at it, and she used to do my clothes for many years. She is my inspiration,” Bobby concluded.
Bobby and Tanya tied the knot on May 30, 1996, and are parents to two sons, Aryaman and Dharam. Professionally, the actor was recently seen in Anurag Kashyap's Bandar and will next appear in Alpha alongside Alia Bhatt and Sharvari.
Bobby reflected on the women who have shaped him the most, his mother, Prakash Kaur , and his wife, Tanya. He began by speaking about how his mother's role in the Deol family is often overlooked because she has never been part of the film industry.
“My mother has been a housewife all her life. People keep thinking that our dad is the biggest reason for the way we are, but it is never that way. It’s the mother who plays the biggest role in how the kids are. Because my mom is not an actor, so we end up talking more about my father. But my mother is just an amazing woman. She was so young when she got married to him. The fame and the glory that came, she never really got into it. She was a simple woman and still is… totally grounded,” he said in an interview with Ranveer Allahbadia on his podcast.
Dharmendra and Prakash Kaur married in 1954, before the legendary actor moved to Mumbai to pursue his film career. Together, they raised four children—Sunny, Bobby, Ajeeta and Vijayta. Years later, Dharmendra married Hema Malini in 1980.
Drawing parallels with his own marriage, Bobby spoke about the immense contribution women make to a household, often without receiving enough recognition.
“I am seeing that happening with my own personal life, with my wife. My wife works. We come from a very strict culture where women don’t work and men go out to work, but people make it sound like women are not working. But, they are doing the most important job – taking care of the house. The women has to keep worrying about the house. They are so strong, I have a lot of respect for them.”
The actor went on to describe Tanya as the pillar of strength who helped him navigate the darkest chapter of his life when his career had stalled for over a decade.
“I have learnt so much from my mother that way, and from my wife. My wife is like my backbone. I am what I am today is because my wife stood by me. I would have been scattered without her. The problem is… Your family would never be that blunt with you. But a wife can see you and she knows what you’re capable of. She stood by me throughout those dark times, for those 10-15 years, she was working and taking care of things, financially and everything. She has brought up my boys so well,” he shared.
Bobby also fondly revisited the beginning of his love story with Tanya, recalling how he first noticed her at a party in the mid-1990s.
“When I look back, 30 years ago when I used to party a lot, I went to this card party. I didn’t play cards and I was in crutches which slowed me down a little bit. I saw this woman sitting there and that was it. I had seen her somewhere earlier as well, when I was with a few friends. I still remember she was wearing a striped top. I told someone to tell her that I said ‘Hi’,” he recounted.
Their paths crossed again, and Bobby was determined not to let the opportunity slip away.
“So when we met at the card party for the second time, I hate gambling and I was losing to her. I asked her, ‘Can I take you out for dinner instead?’ Then, I chased her and I used to gatecrash parties to meet her. Finally, the day I spoke to her, we spoke for hours and hours, it was just meant to be. Despite having a very reckless lifestyle, my father-in-law agreed to our marriage because he had so much respect for my father.”
After nearly three decades of marriage, Bobby says he has realised that relationships are built on understanding rather than trying to change one another.
“I have learnt one thing that nothing is perfect. You go through ups and downs in your relationship. Every time the other person is trying to change the other person for their own desires and wants, and you learn. Marriage is not like ‘Oh, I am married now, I have to behave this way’.”
He added, “You learn, you realise, and you see that you cannot change each other. But, try to compromise at times and be something for the moment, because the other person wants it, but you can’t change the other person completely. That’s one of the most important things in a marriage, and respect, trust.”
Bobby also candidly addressed his struggles with alcohol and admitted that it was during that period that he truly understood everything Tanya had been doing for the family.
“When I wasn’t intoxicated anymore and started looking after myself. She was my inspiration because I was sitting at home and she took care of everything. I never thought of what all she was going through. That’s when I realised, I had just taken my wife for granted. What kind of example am I as a parent? That changed everything,” he said.
Reflecting on those years, the actor acknowledged that Tanya endured the most difficult version of him, yet never stopped supporting him.
“My wife got the worst of me. She was the only one who took and was still there for me. My wife is many years younger than me and she has taught herself the business she is doing. She was into interiors, very good at it, and she used to do my clothes for many years. She is my inspiration,” Bobby concluded.
Bobby and Tanya tied the knot on May 30, 1996, and are parents to two sons, Aryaman and Dharam. Professionally, the actor was recently seen in Anurag Kashyap's Bandar and will next appear in Alpha alongside Alia Bhatt and Sharvari.
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